Here’s a touching story I received from Jackie:
Today I decided I was going to buy a sundress. I started off having to talk myself up because I struggle with severe self-image issues. My struggle gets so bad I cover my home mirrors, but I wanted to prevent that from happening this time around. So I prayed. I reminded myself that I am beautiful because… and made a list of things that make me beautiful, but none of the list included physical features. It was a list of inner beauty or spiritual gifts.
As I packed up my daughter and headed out to the car, I said another prayer because I started to use negative self-talk such as…
“You haven’t lost enough weight.”
“Why buy more clothes? You will always be ugly.”
“You should really tone your arms before buying a sun dress.”
So I stopped to pray for the Lord’s help to change my attitude and self-defeat. And he did! By the time I got to K-mart to look at their options, I was ready for this! I walked in and found two dresses I liked and headed for the dressing rooms, all the while thinking “Oh my goodness! They have mirrors in the dressing rooms and outside them, too! I cannot hide from them.” So I said another prayer. And God answered again!
I got into the dressing room to try on the two dresses, and neither one fit my body shape properly! A year ago this would have caused me to break down in tears, give up on shopping all together, get some food and go home to binge eat. And the entire time my mentality would be that’s OK because I’m already disgusting! Not to mention at home my mirrors would be covered because I can’t stand looking the person looking back. But, I did not respond this way!!! I prayed again, and God answered again!
I moved on to Walmart, found two dresses I liked, and headed into the changing room. More mirrors. More anxiety!!! More prayers. More answers!! I tried on dress number one, and it did not fit, so I reluctantly tried dress two. Immediately, I loved the way it looked! I bought the dress and got a lot of compliments when I wore it today!!!
I wore the dress about two hours when I got a call from my husband saying a bill was due we forgot about, and that I would have to take the dress back so we could pay the bill. I was crushed, angry, and jealous of other people who were not struggling financially. But mostly I was sad because this dress made me feel more beautiful than I have in a while. So I prayed, and God answered again! All the sudden I felt pretty even though I was in lounge pants and a baggy t-shirt. God reminded me of the list I created in the morning of all my inner beauty and spiritual gifts so I looked that over and thanked God for his guidance.
God changed my attitude multiple times today, because he loves me. I believe the list in the morning was because he knew I would need it in the afternoon! God is great and all-knowing, but it really hit me today on a new level of realization. That list is being typed, framed, and will be hanging above my full-length mirror because God wants me to know I’m beautiful. No matter how I personally judge what I see in a mirror. Just think about it . . . all of this because I wanted a dress, but God can use anything, no matter how small, to teach us. We just need to open ourselves up and allow God to speak to us!